Nice To See You…But I Don’t Even Know Who You Are…

If you are like most of us, you’re getting invitations to class reunions. Question is – what to do with those invitations a half century later? If you were born before 1955, you’ve already experienced the trauma and bewilderment of your 50th reunion and not knowing who anyone is.

The last class reunion I attended was my 10th in 1985. I would walk around Bowie Senior High’s Class of 1975 (Bowie, Maryland) and recognize most of my classmates. We were still young and quite identifiable. No one had to glance at a name tag. My reunion included a formal dinner at the Capital Centre (gone now) and a picnic the next day at Allen Pond Park in a more relaxed atmosphere with families and friends, which included the same cliques who hung out together in high school who also hung out together at the park a decade later.

That was 40 years ago.

There were the elitists of my graduating class – the cheerleaders and super jocks who didn’t have time for the rest of us. And then – there were the rest of us – the “untouchables” who hung out together in a different world entirely.

Ironically, most of the “in-crowd” at my high school never made headlines after graduation. At least I haven’t seen evidence of it. They don’t even come up on our radar a lifetime later because we are all living in different worlds. At times, I can’t even remember their names.

There were the “seldom seen” dork types like me who lacked self-confidence, were uncool, whose mothers dressed us who came of age and vanished from the area. We moved on. A lot of us in the huddled masses wanted more for our lives. It took a while for some of us. We’ve raised our kids and grandkids, enjoyed fruitful careers, and have something to show for it as we enter retirement. Not all of us did. A lot of us fell into hard times with failing health, financial woes, or loss of a loved one.

And consider this – quite a few aren’t here anymore to complain about aches and pains – a reminder to stop complaining and start living. You’re not dead yet.

I believe the “in-crowd” didn’t know what do after graduation. They were “on top” in high school, very popular, yet were completely lost after graduation when no one was watching anymore. They just didn’t know what to do. Some stories are rather tragic where some got into drugs or alcoholism, got into trouble with the law, or just never went any further with their lives.

There are also the success stories – those who landed on top and have achieved greatness in their adult lives. Kathy Lee Gifford is one such success story from my high school. She was Class of 1971 and graduated with my sister. When she and Rick Sellers were on the Bowie Senior High stage performing the musical “South Pacific,” we felt they were going somewhere because they were very good at their craft. No idea where Rick is today but most of us understand what Kathy became – quite visible in television for decades now. She was a cohost of NBC’s “Today” show and became an integral part of the respected NBC News fraternity.

There is also Abby Phillip, a Bowie High graduate who hosts NewsNight with Abby Phillip on CNN and has made quite a name for herself as a Washington reporter and news anchor.

If ever you’ve attended a class reunion, you understand the bewildering nature of seeing people you hung out with in high school whom you do not recognize today. The generation that didn’t trust anyone over 30 is now in its sixties and seventies. Genetics is the darnedest thing. Some of us have aged very well and are clearly recognizable. Others of us suffer from wrinkles, gray hair, crow’s feet, and the rest of it. This is when it becomes, “Who did you say you were again?”

Whether or not you attend your class reunion is a personal decision. If you’re like me, you have very little in common with your classmates though you spent every day together before graduation. You learn quickly you’ve been 18 and you are sixty-something and 18 was a long time ago.