When A Cool Breeze Signaled the Misery of “Back to School…”

When we were mid-century boomer kids, summertime meant carefree days, picnics, swimming, bike riding, kickball, and a host of other activities we enjoyed during that brief hiatus from education. For me, it always meant summer school because I was a lousy student. For the rest of you, it meant goofing off and taking in a little downtime before getting back to the grind.

“Back To School” advertising was as predictable as the roar of late summer locusts in the dog days of summer. It was the annual fiscal cash cow for merchants of school clothes, tight shoes, and school supplies. For kids, it was the tiresome ritual of trying on clothes and shoes, and my mother telling me, “Oh, you will be fine, your new shoes will loosen up…” when she was told repeatedly they were too tight and hurt like stink. I think of her insistence every time I take my shoes off to be greeted with hammer toes and ingrown toenails 60 years later.

A half century ago, parents never listened to what kids wanted. You were told you were going to like it – and like it! Otherwise, there would be hell to pay when you got home. God bless my mom. I suppose she meant well but it was always, “If you embarrass me…I am going to embarrass you…” which was incentive never to act up or argue over those stupid penny loafers I hated and were forced to wear.

Whenever I watch “A Christmas Story…” I am reminded of the emotional scar tissue I still have from childhood. Those who say children are resilient have never been children. They emerged from the womb and promptly became stupid, clueless adults. They never experienced childhood.

Poor Randy, Ralphie’s little brother, was in a full body snow suit buried in nylon, silk, cotton, and thick foam and could not put his arms down. His mother tried in vain to hold his arms down. Frustrated, she said, “You can put your arms down when you get to school…” That was something my mother would say, leading to all kinds of frustration and utter contempt because no kid wants to be miserable on the way to school. I can still hear, “your shoes are fine, they just have to wear in…”

Sure Mom…

Those first days back to school right after Labor Day were spent in hot, humid classrooms where it was miserable, making it challenging for a kid with Attention Deficit to focus on school work. We didn’t have air conditioning in those days either. We were never permitted to use a pen. It was always a #2 pencil where I grew up. I went through a lot of erasers,

These days, children are allowed excessive latitude in the classroom – cell phones, vaping, and the freedom to run their mouths. Their demeanor with authority is laughable much as it is with the police dealing with defiant, obnoxious adults. Where I went to school in Maryland, you respected authority or else. I spent a lot of time in the hallways because I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut. Boredom always got the best of me. I respected authority – I just had no self-control.

We had a vice principal at my junior high school, a former marine, who taught us zero tolerance and what it meant. He would bounce defiant youths off the walls, which was a very effective means of communication. It would happen only once. Today, he would be arrested and the school system sued for the emotional trauma inflicted upon little Johnny Be Good. I will never condone physical violence from an administrator; however, it put an end to behavioral issues.